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General Category => General Talk => Topic started by: Hatman on October 21, 2007, 08:11:35 pm

Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: Hatman on October 21, 2007, 08:11:35 pm
Have you ever had a barber so insidiously bad at his job?  One that maybe cut your hair too short, or too long, etc?  Talk about a barber who has wronged you.

I had just recently returned from a barber shop set with a pseudo-asian atmosphere.  All of the employees were asian, but it was hard to determine their ethnicity any further than that. Many posters on the walls depicted Japanese ads and such, but the employees appeared to be Chinese and spoke a language I just couldn't interpret.  I got several chances to try to analyze it, too, considering how chatty everyone was there.  The barber himself, though, was very, very rough while cutting.  He had hit the bone edge close to my temple countless times.  Not to mention the fact that he couldn't remember what I had told him three seconds earlier. I'm usually fine with a barber checking if what he's done is okay, but this guy was just ridiculous.  Every time he took at least three snips with his scissor, he turned to me and asked me if I approved of his performance so far.  It was actually pretty funny, in retrospect.
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: kermit the toad on October 21, 2007, 09:07:02 pm
I've never had a bad barber. But, I went to the same barber for pretty much my entire life, and for the last few years I have cut my own hair, since I just shave it down to a super short buzzcut (and I will not pay $13 for someone to shave my head).

I remember years ago, though, that my cousin told me a hilarious story of going to a bald barber. It seems that the "never trust a bald barber" thing is true, because this guy was horrible. First, after my cousin already told him what kind of haircut he wanted (a "skater cut," which is a variation of the terrible mushroom cut that was popular back in the early 1990s when this story takes place), the barber asked him, "Are you sure you don't want a nice shiner like me?" He was not joking.

He cousin, of course, said, "No, I don't want to be bald, thanks." Then, the guy started cutting his hair, but started doing it completely wrong. If my other cousin (i.e.: my cousin's sister) hadn't been sitting in the waiting area, and noticed, "Um, you're not cutting his hair the way he asked," it would have been a disaster. As it was, it was still a pretty bad haircut, because the barber had already done a lot of damage, and wasn't able to completely fix his "mistake" by the time my cousin noticed he was doing it wrong.
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: Madolah on October 21, 2007, 09:40:55 pm
yup.   Not His fault though.
I was getting my normal cut and he was almost finished, took the razor no cover and was shaving the odd hair on the top of my neck ad by there ears (which they normally do) and he got stung by a wasp so he jolted his arm and shaved a part of hair about 3inches long around my ear.  So i had to go all
"G" and get an almost fade out.  but being it like 1998-1999 that stuff was cool.
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: Wash Cycle on October 21, 2007, 10:05:47 pm
yes I received a prince valiant cut from some redneck methhead missing most of her teeth once

we dont get our hair cut in delaware anymore

http://www.bdportugal.info/Comics/Hero/Prince_Valiant/image/PrinceValiant2.jpg <- not the haircut I asked for
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: ATARI on October 21, 2007, 10:07:19 pm
I haven't really had any bad barber experiences.  Most of my life I have kept my hair pretty short, and if I saw that something wasn't even, or was really bad, I would just take care of it myself by making it pretty short.
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: Sarah on October 21, 2007, 10:12:23 pm
I once asked for a trim and ended up getting a buzzcut. I was not happy.

Since then I have been cutting my own hair.
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: NightBlade on October 22, 2007, 01:46:39 am
Quote from: Mayor Boytouch on October 21, 2007, 10:12:23 pm
Since then I have been cutting my own hair.

... How does that work, exactly?



Anyway, I've had my fair share.

One time, this barber farted in this stuffy barber shop on a 80 degree day.

That is not the worst of it, one day I was getting my hair cut, and this particular gentlemen had the distinct odor of sweaty crotch and raw chicken.

Then there was this time my mother screwed up my hair cut when I was 5 years old, so I had to go to school the next day bald...

Hm, there's this one time when I was 7, I moved too much during my haircut, causing my hair to come out uneven; my father spent the duration of the trip home literally kicking me in the ass.

Oh wait, I can't forget about the time my cousin's boyfriend (who was apparently still learning to be a barber) cut my hair rather well; of course when he moved onto my brother he screwed his hair right the hell up, forcing him to wear a yankees cap for a while. By the way, my brother (and I) hate baseball.


Thats all that comes to mind at the moment.
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: Yeaster on October 22, 2007, 01:50:45 am
Well, when I first got my locks in, the old person who used to them mysteriously vanished, so I used to go to place to place looking for a replacement - and they were all terrible.

Seriously. I even went to an African shop. They're supposed to be pros at locking hair, yet ironically they were the first. Two years ago, I had a really bad case of frizziness, and it came from them.

Thankfully, though, I found someone good a year and ago, so I now I don't have that problem anymore.
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: baconboy935 on October 22, 2007, 01:52:41 am
Once when I was seven I went to this new barbers place. the barber almost cut off my freaking ear. I was seriously scarred for life. Which is partially the reason for my long hair now.  :fogetcool:

Morale: Don't trust a barber just out of college to cut your hair.
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: missingno on October 22, 2007, 02:03:37 am
I have my mom do my haircut.

hell yes motherfuckers
that shit is free
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: Sarah on October 22, 2007, 02:12:03 am
Quote from: NightBlade on October 22, 2007, 01:46:39 am

... How does that work, exactly?
Easy: mirror, scissors, and electric razor with a protector (also used for layering.)
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: Lord Kamina on October 22, 2007, 02:36:57 am
Not really. I go to this guy that cuts really good and really cheap ($5)
At first he was a regular barber but then he began becoming famous among the local people and now I gotta like, book a date with anticipation and shit.

Anyway, by now he pretty much can cut my hair by heart.
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: something bizarre and impractical on October 22, 2007, 04:06:03 am
I forget why I ended up doing this, but once I went to a barber that was different than my usual one. I think maybe she was closed and then other shop was about on a five minute walk away. Anyways, I go in and ask basically for a buzz cut. You know? I want it really short, because my hair is extremely thick and grows VERY fast (faster than anyone I even know. Hell this has even been mentioned to me by other people too). So I sit down and tell her what I want, and I say I want to keep the sideburns. They weren't much because I hadn't really developed an ability to grow serious facial hair yet, but I don't like the 'straight line to ear' thing. Anyways, she starts cutting and buzzing away and then goes and buzzes off part of the sideburns. I was stunned, so I wasn't sure what to do. I mean, she couldn't glue it back on so I might as well just go with it. She buzzes the bottom of the other one too, not completely off, but not what I wanted either. All the while she is talking with the other hairdresser and barely paying attention. She puts her fingers on the side of my head to make sure the sideburns (what is left of) are even. Then she asks me, "Does that look good?" And I'm like, "These aren't even? You see what I mean? This one is shorter." And she goes "Okay." and then cuts it on an angle. And I seriously was stunned again. I was like, "No, it's not on an angle, it's just longer." And then she cuts the sideburn on an even more acute angle and was like, "Like that?" I just agreed and pretended that's what I wanted. I paid her, but I had half a mind not to. I ended up coming home and shaving a lot of the sideburn off both sides to make them even lengths.
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: Kaempfer on October 24, 2007, 06:57:25 pm
The last haircut I got was awful. It turned out alright, now that it's grown in about a week (which is enough time for it to realize wtf and react like hair should) but when I was getting it it was horrible. The woman was TRYING TO BREAK MY SKULL I swear to god. Every time she combed some hair she jabbed the comb into me as hard as she could. Now, my skull is pretty tough so whatever, but my ears were beet red afterwards because she kept hitting them with the fucking comb, and then the scissors, and then the shaver. And I asked for a specific length and she cut it way longer than that, so I asked her to cut it a bit shorter and she kept warning me OVER AND OVER like that was the WORST THING I could do, even though I have gotten that length before.

Now, I don't know shit about hair, and when some bitch keeps saying "THAT IS REALLY SHORT" it starts to worry me! I am glad it worked out though, although my ears were in genuine pain. Like, did she really have to smash the comb into them? There wasn't even any hair there! Plus it cost me $24 bones (inc. tip) which is nonsense, because it's such a fucking simple haircut (short).

I seriously think I'm just going to get my mom to cut my hair for me next time. I don't really give a shit how it looks, and if it means $24 in my wallet then I am please as Punch.

Plus this girl reeked of smoke. Thanks for being a horrible cunt!
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: Marcus on October 24, 2007, 07:12:57 pm
Black barber's don't fuck up.  If you want a terrific cut whether you're white, black, asian, hispanic, whatever then go to a black barber. 

This is a well known fact because if you fuck up a niggaz hair you're bound to get shot.  I'm a nice guy, but fucking up my hair will make me pull a nine out of hammerspace and you wouldn't want that.
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: dada on October 24, 2007, 07:40:00 pm
Quote from: angry black man on October 24, 2007, 07:12:57 pm
Black barber's don't fuck up.  If you want a terrific cut whether you're white, black, asian, hispanic, whatever then go to a black barber. 
I've considered doing this, but as you can see here (http://images.google.com/images?svnum=10&um=1&hl=en&q=black+man&btnG=Search+Images), black people usually don't have a lot of hair. I don't think he'll do a good job if I tell him to just kind of trim my hair a little bit. I've got a lot of hair.
Quote from: NightBlade on October 22, 2007, 01:46:39 am
Quote from: Mayor Boytouch on October 21, 2007, 10:12:23 pm
Since then I have been cutting my own hair.
... How does that work, exactly?
You grab some scissors, sit in front of a mirror and cut your own hair.
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: dinozand1 on October 24, 2007, 08:18:13 pm
There was this female barber that cut my hair a while ago.  Unfortunately, she was too busy getting hit on by other men to pay attentio to my hair :sweat:
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: Iaman on October 24, 2007, 08:26:30 pm
I had a nasty case with this one guy once...  I think his name was Mr. Todd or something.
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: Mince Wobley on October 24, 2007, 08:40:10 pm
No I never went to a terrible barber, except for one time when I was a little child that a barber cut my hair and I don't know why but I was crying a lot. Now I don't cut my hair anymore.
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: Brown on October 25, 2007, 01:17:55 am
around here a good barber is around 15-20$

i go to this vietnamese lady and her daughter and they charge me 9$ for a decent haircut. by decent i mean the hair is even in places it should be. so its not so bad.


but when i have the money and i have an event to goto (prom etc) i go to an expensive barber who cuts my hair so you dont notice that im balding
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: Burning_Phoenix on October 25, 2007, 03:04:41 pm
Ah yes, plenty.
Just four-five days ago I even had one.
Usually if I want to go to a good barber it costs me around 30 euros (they're really good though), but at the end of my street there are 2, both extremely cheap.
So being the lazy bastard I am I went to one of those.
Unfortunately the woman cutting my hair was a new barber (at one point she even asked to the other barber how to get both sides of my hair equally long or something like that), and now I notice that my hair in the middle of my head is much longer than my hair at the front of my head, which makes it look rather wavy.
Next time I'll just go to the 30 euro barber because I actually have faith in them.
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: kermit the toad on October 26, 2007, 02:10:50 am
Quote from: Dada on October 24, 2007, 07:40:00 pm
I've considered doing this, but as you can see here (http://images.google.com/images?svnum=10&um=1&hl=en&q=black+man&btnG=Search+Images), black people usually don't have a lot of hair.
It's a good thing I don't visit GW at work, because when I clicked your link, one of the images I got was...well...see for yourself.


But, um, I guess he doesn't have a lot of hair...

Let this be a lesson for you, children, always use Google with safe search turned ON, unless you're trying to find black men tugging themselves off.
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: Kaempfer on October 26, 2007, 03:31:52 am
Jesus Christ, is that Spike Lee?

Also, 30 Euros? Dude, that's like $45 Canadian (or $90 American lolololol).

You could buy a lot of things for 45 dollars, man. That was 6 new GI Joes back in the day!
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: baseball19225 on October 27, 2007, 08:32:17 am
I guess there was one I got about a day before going back to school. Normally the hairdresser was pretty good, and I got a great price since she was my dad's cousin... not this time. I ended up coming out with some awful short faggot shit and had it for about 2 weeks.

Then there's that time my mother cut my hair (I was about 7). She pissed me off somehow so I just jerked around as revenge. Turned out that that was a dumb idea--I ended up with a big goofy line thing up the back.

Oh heh and one time a hairdresser cut my mother's ear.
Title: Bad Barbers
Post by: dada on October 27, 2007, 09:10:47 am
Quote from: kermit the toad on October 26, 2007, 02:10:50 am
It's a good thing I don't visit GW at work, because when I clicked your link, one of the images I got was...well...see for yourself.
I didn't see that photo because Google personalizes results these days.