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Archives => GW Blog => Community Content => Blog: Games => Topic started by: Sarevok on March 19, 2008, 04:17:45 pm

Title: Sexy second life [games] [humour]
Post by: Sarevok on March 19, 2008, 04:17:45 pm
Sex. It's not something us gamers are particularly familiar with; most of us loathe and shun the concept of meeting REAL people in REAL life. As such it's not something that we particularly understand and we fear it greatly.

Yesterday the UK magazine PC Zone decided to put it's foot down and make a stand against the impure heathens tainting the land in the well known sex-simulator Second Life. Several of the editors rounded up members of the community, myself included, we donned our radiation suits and departed for what was to be a rollercoaster ride of furries, giant pink penises and lusty dancers on tiki beaches.

I'm sincerely hoping that NONE of you are familiar with the 'character creation' in second life, so let me walk it through you a little. You get to pick a first name of your choice and the game presents you with a pregenerated list of surnames to pick from. Oddly one of these is 'Gay' and within minutes Impretty Gay, the giant rabid bible-spouting furry was stepping foot into the world.

I've been in second life once before, and I can honestly say it's the absolute fucking worst 'game' I've ever played, if you can even call it that. Everyone else that's 'played' it with me agrees. The camera is terrible, the controls are worse and there's nothing you can actually DO in it, short of flying over to sandbox island and making giant penis-shooting cannons, so that's what we did whilst we waited for the bulk of the protest to arrive. 'Log', the PC Zone editor primarily organising it, had already created us a bunch of placards to carry whilst walking around in order to give our protest more power. Needless to say, me being me, I got a bit carried away.

(http://freewebs.com/iruka/sl2thumb.jpg) (http://freewebs.com/iruka/sl2.jpg)


Then we did some stuff which none of you care about to pass the time until the full force arrived, and soon we were raiding protesting in our first destination. Time to hit 'Sexy Tiki Beach'. At first it began with us screaming our god-given words at the half naked ladies pole dancing on the beach, and ordering them to put some clothes on (and head back to the kitchen to make us dinner), and soon we had a strangely large crowd of nymphomaniacs staring at the various furries and priests covered in placards yelling abuse at them. Surprisingly we didn't get banned (at this point), and soon someone found out the item in the beach that got us DANCING FOR JESUS! You'll notice my character has become considerably chubbier and you can actually read the signs in this screenshot.

(http://freewebs.com/iruka/sl4thumb.jpg) (http://freewebs.com/iruka/sl4.jpg)


The protest was in full swing! We thought we had them now, but sadly our message was falling upon deaf ears, and soon it became apparant that they only understand the language of loooove. Somehow one of the other PC Zone editors had a supply of giant pink cocks to hand and had pre-equipped us with the tools for this task. We all became huge dancing hypocrites for the lulz in order to get attention and sell our message to the people.

(http://freewebs.com/iruka/sl5thumb.jpg) (http://freewebs.com/iruka/sl5.jpg)


Unsurprisingly this garnered even more attention from the local mexican dancers, and we desperately tried to carry on the march despite all the abuse and threats of banning that were hurled in our direction. Sadly, they eventually got tired and one of the naked admins ejected us all from Sexy Tiki Beach, never to return. Our message had been heard, we rejoiced in the name of the Lord. A few other locations were picked to protest in, but none really had the impact or the fun of the tiki beach affair, except for our final destination in Sexy Toy Shop, or whatever the hell it was called.

Again, for those of you (everyone) that haven't played second life, you can't 'do' animations with actions like most games; animations are defined by scripts in objects, and interacting with these objects make you do the assigned animation. I'll let you guess what sort of clickable animations are setup in a sex shop. Sadly the sight of priests and giant furries in all these various poses was far too hilarious to ignore, and soon the protest had degenerated from a holy crusade against the filthy sinners into a giant sex orgy and we realised we too had succumbed to the Second Life Virus™. There's no pictures of this point because the walls were literally plastered with various porno pictures and videos, and we here at GW don't like that sorta thing do we! Oh no, we don't.



And that about sums up my sexy adventure in second life. Got any tales of your (mis)adventures in Second life? Or god-forbid one of you actually ENJOYS the..program? Then leave a comment and we'll flame you as soon as we can!
Title: Sexy second life [games] [humour]
Post by: local_dunce on March 19, 2008, 04:45:42 pm
I really think these old "RAID" things got a little old but second life really is one of the most disgusting things ever invented.
Title: Sexy second life [games] [humour]
Post by: Artis Leon Ivey Jr on March 19, 2008, 04:52:51 pm
this was the gayest protest, the best one is "out the window"
Title: Sexy second life [games] [humour]
Post by: Sludgelord on March 19, 2008, 04:54:49 pm
(http://chef.avalanchestudios.net/secondlife1.jpg)
(http://chef.avalanchestudios.net/secondlife2.jpg)

that was my secondlife protest. i was protesting abortion.
Title: Sexy second life [games] [humour]
Post by: Artis Leon Ivey Jr on March 19, 2008, 05:05:22 pm
chef post out the window I can't find it!
Title: Sexy second life [games] [humour]
Post by: GirlBones on March 19, 2008, 08:53:29 pm
well it seems like you had fun perhaps second life isn't so horrible after all???


and are you serious that there isn't a point to second life? i always thought it was like a weird version of wow or something?
Title: Sexy second life [games] [humour]
Post by: Kaworu on March 19, 2008, 09:07:42 pm
Second Life, I CAN totally understand why people get so into it. For me when playing it was the equivalent of hanging round a mall with my best buds, but instead of hanging it was spawning two armies of Daleks and having them duke it out, and by mall it was Segiru's place.
I think that it does take a while to get into, but when I was playing it (READ: 2006) we could find a lot to do, from gambling and making moneys to making pacman shaped furniture to go-kart racing, playing uno, playing in an FPS, flying around in a WOTW martian spaceship, dressing as a Zebra/Bear/Panda hybrid and galloping around the furrylands. I dunno if I could do it nowadays though, I've changed a great deal since then, but it was fun. I ain't defending the program or comunity, because I know how bad it is perhaps more than any of you guys ever will, but well I had fun.

Anyways:
(http://img225.imageshack.us/img225/3815/slprideem9.jpg)


Yeah there's totally no point to it, it's as the name says meant to be a second life where you just do shit. People have become millionaires by making stuff in a sandbox and selling it and then converting their lindendollars to real money (not millionaires but you know, they're earning a real living and have secondlife companies. Even fashion brands like Adidas and crap started releasing stuff officially on there). We had ideas of doing stuff like that (I made a pac-man chair!) I dunno you should ask RPGjaguar he was pretty cool at making shit and I think he started selling Warhammer armours or something, but I have no idea what happened afterwards.
Title: Sexy second life [games] [humour]
Post by: Emirpoen on March 20, 2008, 02:28:55 am
Second Life is blah....lame.....pointless. More or less, the only reason i really even bothered with it, not once, but twice was for a friend.
However, I left due to the bullshit drama, my friend's BS and insane second life vanity and lack of purpose it serves. She hasnt e-mailed me recently, asking me to come back again, so i think the point got across. Also, Second Life has the audacity to charge you 10 USD  for account deletion.

 Also, on a similar topic, don't even bother with Kaneva. Its the same thing, only more facist.
Title: Sexy second life [games] [humour]
Post by: Sarevok on March 20, 2008, 02:48:06 am
Rofl what, they charge you to DELETE accounts?
Title: Sexy second life [games] [humour]
Post by: Cardinal Ximenez on March 20, 2008, 06:17:43 am
Second Life is interesting, but it is fatally flawed by centralization. For a popular metaverse to really thrive, open protocols and servers are needed. Do not even get me started about the "economy".
Title: Sexy second life [games] [humour]
Post by: Alexander Morou on March 22, 2008, 02:36:07 pm
A friend of mine is interested in Second Life due to the economical gain from it.  He doesn't invest insane amounts of time in the game, from what I recall, but he does sell a script that allows other merchants to keep track of their sales, and does basic marketing reports.  He was trying to get me involved in it and I thought it was silly, at best.  I figure why worry about 'second life' when 'real life' is more important.
Title: Sexy second life [games] [humour]
Post by: Ragnar on March 22, 2008, 11:22:25 pm
Second Life looks like the future of videogames circa the N64 except there seem to be more emos and furries and ads and discotechs
Title: Sexy second life [games] [humour]
Post by: Artis Leon Ivey Jr on March 22, 2008, 11:32:02 pm
Quote from: Meta Sal Dalí on March 20, 2008, 08:09:46 am
(http://i252.photobucket.com/albums/hh2/solobuttons/outthewindow.png)
goddammit thank you so much.
Title: Sexy second life [games] [humour]
Post by: Artis Leon Ivey Jr on March 23, 2008, 07:43:17 pm
(https://legacy.gamingw.net/etc/www.faithmouse.com/cartoon581large.jpeg)
Title: Sexy second life [games] [humour]
Post by: Swordfish on April 06, 2008, 09:59:15 pm
Quote from: Kaworu on March 19, 2008, 09:07:42 pm
Yeah there's totally no point to it, it's as the name says meant to be a second life where you just do shit. People have become millionaires by making stuff in a sandbox and selling it and then converting their lindendollars to real money (not millionaires but you know, they're earning a real living and have secondlife companies. Even fashion brands like Adidas and crap started releasing stuff officially on there). We had ideas of doing stuff like that (I made a pac-man chair!) I dunno you should ask RPGjaguar he was pretty cool at making shit and I think he started selling Warhammer armours or something, but I have no idea what happened afterwards.
Oh i started, made a small amount but then after the Second life acount database got hacked and i tried to reset my pass, but something weired happened and now i can't log in, hell i can't even remember what my pass is or was, and i don't even remember what screwed up the attempts to re-set my pass. For the record, i can't actually remember how to build stuff in SL any more, but i made a lot of things, even built a space station :P. but that was ages ago and i doubt I'll play it again.

i know this was kind of old, but i just noticed and wanted to set the records straight.
Title: Sexy second life [games] [humour]
Post by: goat on April 07, 2008, 01:21:05 am
is this like IMVU where the object of the game is to converse with random people, play horrible mini games, and waste your money on virtual crap?