Yeah I'm not very good at counting and that's the only way I can follow some V Snares songs is by waiting for the big gabber kick he puts smack on the 1 of each bar. Lol i think he might've done it a lot on meathole.
Re: games I've been thinking lately the big mysstery hole behind them is that we didn't make ENOUGH GAMES. Like people all acted like holy shit, they're so many games coming out, how could gamers ever get tired of this!!!!!... but in retrospect there are only a few thousand. (Like with beetles being the most varied species irl, ignoring phone games, where there are like 10 billion that nobody will ever play) Games are expensive and take a long time to make. But the popular trends was always towards cinematic -> i.e. REALISTIC quality, sure you'd get people going "i want a game that looks like a cartoon" (-> Shitty cel shading) but on the whole you only had this very short time period where people were willing to be limited by their styles. We only had like ten years before the norm became to not even try to stylize things, why bother? you don't need to. after discs everything just becomes about cramming in boring and gritty details and taking away anything that could be called Gay or Weird by the gamer markets which are suddenly much more... teenage than before. There was such a short time for people to be forced to make it interesting, so by the time they got really cheaply done and any child could make a weird one with a regular consumer setup (2000s)
It's crazy to think how complex the factors are surrounding video games and how it turned the ones that got made into what they are, for instance -> when a game is released or even just HYPED for release it creates its own audience and copycats, so the journalistic and civilian rush to predict and "conduce" games was/is like a giant behemothic rotating weapon that totally chaos-theoried the future of countless gamers differently, seismically with every slight interest in Dragon Quest.
I like talking about yknow the OVERARCHING PATTERNS OF SOCIETY... I KNOW ABOUT CULTURE... I AM NOT A NO NOTHING.... but really I just like stuff like gaudy colors and noisy, complex stuff. Not saying it makes me understand anything better, I like not understanding things. I like getting confused and awestruck by unexpected shit and I don't really like laughing at funny/fragile stuff in conflicting situations, I think that shit is really powerful and affecting. Like seeing stupid cartoon characters run through these elaborate woes like they're literary. I think it's like, it's easy to write that off as alien nonsense with no impact on the world, but I think everything ends up sticking in people's minds and changing them in ways they don't realize that even very meager weirdness actually changes the world away from where it was, into a parallel future nobody could have dreamed up on their own. As in, you think surrounding yourself with stupid jokes is fine, until you realize everyone else has been doing that too for ten years and you've accepted a certain level of fakeness into your life. Okay this is ending up stupid but eventually I'll get to the bottom of it.
and it's fucking rubbed (what??? fucking???? is he really angry now??? no way.... I love thinking about this stuff and it makes me happy - but this is the language I would have used had I been able to talk about it when I was 13) fucking rubbed my mind raw that I - not I alone, but everybody who like slightly outre or "not allowed" stuff - have had to spend my whole life CONVINCING people that I'm not trying to... upset them or show off or whatever. I don't understand what lots of people see in regular boring tv shows but that doesn't make me want to mock them and hurt them, I don't think I'm smarter or anything for not liking the same stuff, I just want to be left alone and allowed to say dumb unpopular things are actually important. And it's made complicated by the fact that ALSO, I absolutely DO enjoy showing off how cool my tastes are, or dumping on people who can't handle an out of tune song or whatever, so I can't 100% deny that I am immaturely motivated by other people and being performative, just like they are, I'm not fully achieved in my development towards perfect consumption of only things that push my life towards utterly self-actualized, undesiring nirvana of media. But I really do not want to sound like I'm complaining, like oohhwwooooh I'm sooooo fucked up, on the contrary, part of becoming an adult was realizing how common these feelings are (I found a whole forum of people thinking like it didn't i?) and how easy it is for me to push them (i meant propagate, but i could also mean push like find out how far they keep working...)
I might've mentioned already but I was talking about Nidhogg 2 with some total normie nerd, who had played the first and loved it, so I spun it as "the sequel changed up the art style and made a lot of people mad, but I like it" and went on to say because: not only because I like the weird squishy gross monster texture everything has, but on the conceptual level because it has the balls to be garish (colors and texture) and Outta nowhere, regardless of the series I support that, and on the other conceptual level of it DID make people mad, and I have to nominally support any media that pisses off vanilla pricks by being too left field. I only used a few of those words, but he totally agreed with me. I didn't need to preface it with anything. Lots of people are willing to like stuff if they first meet someone who tells them it's good instead of laughing at it and hating it. Like the hippie scene, the X Files / Roswell conventiongoer scene, the sphere of US military brats, Magic: The Gathering players, rock and roll, Christianity are just these islands in culture where it's considered cool and interesting to treat certain very stupid things with utmost respect. Or like GG Allin, refusing respect, makes people refuse you respect in a sad way to try and take back control. All it takes to get sucked into any of these groups is to have the necessary culture in you, culture like a bacteria, that some existing reward is willing to cultivate. These might come from people, the rewards of being agreed with and having your opinions extended and clarified by those who mine different veins of the same Great Experience (i.e. ragnar and bonzi...) or from hypothetical people from e.g. writings on the internet, daydreams, people you'd like to meet, or fear to meet. Love...
What is it?
Most natural brain killer what there is... LOVE.
edit: Jesus... too much, man... Thinking about it again it's like... mostly just "weirdness" is insanely undervalued by society -> all too often we're scared of it or we laugh at it so it can't touch us in the heart. But I know personally that if you open yourself to crazy stuff and let it affect you like it wants to you get a much fuller experience from the world. Every mistake becomes beautiful and it's not like you need some bizarre mental rewiring experience to do it, you just need to chill out and stop giving credence and belief power to the traditions of thinking about minutiae.
edit2: I generally read a Bonzi post and it gives me a bunch of furious ideas that I write down and then it turns out they're sort of missing the overall focus of what you were talking about - and I wouldn't have it any other way
