im currently nowhere
 
my mother started drinking a few years ago and ive failed my first year of university three times trying to juggle taking care of her kids, taking her drunken abuse and doing a degree. a few months ago she got clean and now im just a 22 year old NEET whos £9000 in debt. im so fucking done with life i feel like im just sitting here waiting for a relapse. i'd kill myself but i can't inflict that pain on my siblings so i just sit here playing videogames and being a worthless human being.
 
sorry to darken the thread or something

 
Hey,
 
I am sorry to make any kind of presumption about what your intentions were in writing this, but if it was in any way a call for help or advice, then I can offer some.
 
It's okay to be nowhere. I work with a lot of people coming out of school in the UK who have a lot of pressure on them to have figured all their shit out by the age of 16. They got forced through this tube of education and most of the time they get squirted out the other end a few years older and just as clueless about what they want to do with their life. They're back in the same situation of unknowing but faced with the same life decisions, but this time instead of sixth form/college it's university. And there is a large number of these kids who get this far and have this sudden moment of realisation that they still don't know what they want to do. So they just pick something and pray, or carry on the path they already set out on, even if they have long lost whatever initial passion they had for that subject.
 
Myself, and my friends and my family, and everyone I work with. None of us are where we want to be. Some of us are in the back half of our twenties (me) and some are late sixties. Some are older, even. Fuck, I know you know this. We're an aimless mass. I just see all this pressure on kids to have figured it all out by X age and none of them have. And when they think they have, a lot of the time it changes.
 
I was 22 before I even started my degree with the OU. I'm still not even halfway through what with chipping away at it around my work. Now four years down the line, I have different interests. I'm not so interested in the subjects I am studying. I doubt I will put it to much use when I'm finished.
 
What I am trying to get at is that it's okay to never know where you want to go because time and experience and perspective can change your goals anyway.
 
As for your debt. Is it an SFE tuition fee loan? The funding for these loans was changed in the last few years (off the top of my head maybe three years ago? Maybe you fall on the right side of this change!?) so that as long as you are earning under a certain amount, you do not have to pay back a penny of the loan until you reach that income bracket. If this is the case, then do not worry about it. Put it out of your mind. It is not even a concern. Further to this, if you don't fall into this income bracket within a certain time frame (30 years maybe?), they will scratch the loan off completely. Okay, maybe that's not the ideal situation but helps relieve the pressure of this debt hanging over your head. Call student finance and see if you fall into this category.
 
Lastly. I know this is a bullshit thing to say, but if it frustrates you that your life is consumed by this aimlessness (the void of videogame escapism) then you should change it. I don't mean some broad stroke like "GO AND GET A JOB" because I know that insurmountable mountain and how bold people on top of it can be when they talk down to you. But you can't move if you do nothing. So do something small. Tiny even. But whatever it is, just don't do nothing because then you are back in that void.
 
And also: http://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help-you/contact-us
 
If you just want to get all this shit off your chest, that's what that phone number is for.
 
I hope this helps you out some.

I sold my collection of vintage pogs and now my life has no meaning.

hello
 
something about this place is stuck in my bones
 
if it is okay by you i would like to try and make amends for my transgressions

The hostages just prolong the time it takes for the army to get in and steamroll them. If they didn't take any hostages the whole thing would be over way too fast because as soon as the army got on scene they would shoot them all dead and it would be over.

Jesus fucking christ... This is horrific.

we killed off the AI so they didn't interfere with our MAN VS TANK.

That was Esh, I already had that achievement dude.

If you want to 'cheat' it, the easiest way would probably be to do it in versus and have the infected not attack at all. Then do it again in reverse.

I think I'll give it a few more months before I resort to cheating

I remember watching this documentary where this guy infiltrated this british underground slave ring where they would bring in immigrants from other countries and force them into prositution and things. they filmed this man forcing a woman to give him head and she was crying and choking and then he punched her in the face and pushed her head into the toilet until she was almost unconscious. Things like this are the reason I personally think prostitution should be legal. The more illegal it becomes, the more it is forced into the shady underworld and the less protection these women can get. I've heard about places where it is legal where there are perfectly legitimate prostitution business, the women do it by choice, they get paid a very decent wage, they are protected and aren't forced to do things that they aren't comfortable doing. This shows to me that ideally the best way is to legalize it because it's a case of FRANKENSTEIN'S MONSTER. If you hide it away behind closed doors the problem is only going to get worse.

music for sure, can't go a day without tuning up some freakout or some shit (I really hate those quiet carrages on trains, Like you jump on one by mistake and some guy moans that your ears are producing guitar solos that distract him from his important numbers.)
Gotta have a daily guitar fix, even if it's like five minutes before I go to sleep, just something.
I'll also just buy CDs for the sake of it, even when I'm poor and need the money for other stuff, if I see a nice album I'll end up buying it.

man I hate people who get on buses and trains and shit and blare music through their headphones loud enough that the rest of us have to listen to it. nobody else wants to listen to that shit, turn it down. I hate it when my sister pulls out her mobile phone and starts playing some stupid music. who gives a shit what music she likes she should play it sometime when we all don't have to listen to it. i hate people who sit on the bus and beatbox and hum tunes and shit, it pisses me the fuck off.

Well I got do not disturb,, also found out in the stats there was only ONE friendly fire incident in the entire campaign so almost got that achievement as well. I'm not looking forward to the one where you can't take damage after contacting the rescue vehicle.

Hahaha, you name it, i've consumed it and become addicted to it.

gomennasai, I play with too many people.

hey PSYBURN

who the HE*LL is HI IM GODOT i've asked this a thousand times.

I swear some people don't know how to play this game.

They are constantly hitting each other with friendly fire on expert with shotguns. It's obvious that anywhere in your CROSSHAIR is where the blast will go, and no this isn't some people getting in each others way. It's just as annoying as people who don't know how to keep up with the rest of the group.

The other thing is when fighting Tanks. Throw a molotov at it. That's it. A Tank dies after about 45 seconds on expert from a molotov no matter what their health is. I was curious as to why I was dying as a Tank while I was on fire in Versus, and this is why!

Protip, every campaign finale has a closet you can hide in. Go in there and stay there THE WHOLE TIME if you want to be cheap. Have everyone grab an auto shotgun and stay in there. When a tank comes, stay in there because 4 auto shotguns at point blank will kill it before it has the chance to kill even one of you. It takes approximately 30 shells on expert, so do the math.

edit: other protip, have a mic.

I was fairly guilty of friendly fire for my first few games. Things like TF2 have got me into SHOOT THROUGH PEOPLE mode. But I've got WAAAAAY better and have got my FF down to like, 1 - 2 hits per full campaign now. I switched out the shotgun for the Uzi/Assault Rifle though and get MAD ACCURACY.

Is there a way to disable the message of the day?

Isn't this server-side?

I feel really sorry if you got it on xbox You've fallen into the same trap I did with TF2. It will never be updated...

I use Vista and I think it's great. Definitely the best OS I've ever used and I've run Macs before and really did not like them very much.

Yeah Magi, any actual gamer, especially in VS mode would not accept that as a legitimate game tactic.