Are you talking about US Jelly (or Jam or whatever) or what we call Jelly in the UK?

If it's the former then jam should be anything but watery! It's meant to be a spread, which needs at least some spreadability rather than just pouring it on shit. Maybe try buying a different brand? I don't know how popular it is there, but you can't move for different brands and types of jam here. Also LEMON CURD.

If it's the latter then don't buy wobbly jelly to eat as you are an adult and need to grow up and eat a diet consisting of Turkey Dinosaur Shapes and sandwiches like me.

Yeah, I guess our "jelly" is "Jell-O" or gelatine or whatever. We call that spreadable shit jam, regardless of its piece o'fruit content (so maybe we erroneously refer to things that do not deserve to be called 'Jam' as 'Jam'!!!)

That's a shame though, like as aware as I am of the American-Supermarket and shit, I always have this vision of Americans like trotting down to mom and pop stores for things like HOMEMADE JAM and DOUGHNUTS and stuff. Like I pretty much exclusively buy everything from a Walmart owned supermarket (ASDA) and most of the produce is a little iffy. However, they haven't fucked over our jams here yet, but who knows what the future holds?

That omelette absolutely blows my mind. You are a PIONEER OF FOODERY! I'm not brave enough to have an omelette where the ingredients aren't "lumps of cheese oh maybe some bacon".

Any culture which adds syrup to bacon and has pancakes/belgian waffles for breakfast is pretty much A-OK by me!

I went through a stage of having pop-tarts for breakfast when I had my first teaching post, but I stopped when other staff members started to laugh at me. It was gentle ribbing and shit, sure, but as far as I'm concerned they are BREAKFASTFASCISTS!

(Admittedly I was one of the only staff members to nearly be having an infarction every time I climbed the stairs to the staff room).