Hell, I guess technically if I take determinism far enough I can't be rationally mad at anyone...
I don't care if I know logically that someone wasn't seeking to hurt me, slurs that target me are gonna hurt me every damn time, and because of that I can extend that feeling to slurs that don't target me. Why the fuck does anyone NEED to be using them anyway? They aren't funny jokes.
For the case of rules of our forum? definitely.
You are right, no one really 'needs' to no, especially not here.
I don't think they are funny either but taste is subjective. Some people find the suffering of other people funny.
(EDIT OOPS I QUOTED THE WRONG POST)
No, they don't really matter that much. Maybe someone would be content to know that someone "didn't mean it", but as I said before it's also the fact that people don't like being confronted with the knowledge that they are treated as second class citizens by society. So you can have the best intentions imaginable, and it would still make someone feel bad. And it really doesn't help to know that someone considers it good humor to say things that you take offense to.
This kind of reminds me of what the hacks like Sam Harris and Christopher Hitchens used to say, about how the US is far better than Osama Bin Laden because we don't intend to kill children, and that puts us "in a different moral universe" (actual quote). But the truth is, it doesn't matter when you're a child that's staring at the smoldering remains of his house and family.
I guess it might be different in your country Dada, but intent is generally considered fairly important in determining the amount of guilt of any party.
Its what separates murder from manslaughter for instance.
Making a special exception makes sense in our case because joining us is optional in the first place and that determining intent over the internet can be fairly difficult.
Also I think its fairly clear Sheppard wanted to stir something up and got more than he wanted.