Oh, I forgot to mention: Cycle 2 starts tomorrow. So from 8:30 to about 2:30 for the rest of the week TRY AND BE REALLY ENTERTAINING GW because I will be sitting in a recliner all day

just do a yotuube search for "semper games" and "gamesmasterjasper" because there are so many videos. hours of laffs.

it was cool that you made a big summary man! obviously a horrible situation of course, but it's bringing us up to date and I understand a bit more now.

is anyone else really worried they've got cancer now? like, 'hmm, little listless this morning. maybe it's cancer?' or 'my toe kinda hurts.... cancer????'

is there like an all over cancer check or something you can do? i'm a bit worried about my health now and i really can't deal with knee pain too well!!!

STEEL HOW COULD YOU HAVE FOUND THIS SOONER?

i gotta say, hearing about all this and keeping up with everything that's going on is really making me aware of all this cancer stuff. i mean, i knew about the basic stuff, since my grandpa had lung cancer a while ago (luckily he was able to cure it with just radiation, if i recall correctly), and a friend of mine also had leukemia a few years ago (but i didnt understand much then, i was young). i'm definitely gonna make a habit of doing self-examinations and trying to stay healthy. i've read so many cancer-related articles recently. now i know all the cancer-preventing foods, ways to talk to your doctor about suspicion of cancer, etc...

so yeah i guess just so you know, WHEN I FEEL MY TITS I'LL THINK OF YOU BUDDY

haha, okay whoa. don't worry about CANCER PREVENTING FOODS and stuff, you'll quickly fall into scams like spirluna or the stuff dok was shilling. the bad thing about all this is, yeah, I could do nothing at all to detect it. the key is

1. regular checkups are always a good thing to do, and yes, get the blood work done.

2. if you feel bad go to the doctor. BM was COUGHING UP BLOOD, I can't imagine not running to the nearest doctor in that case. in almost all cancers there are signs, and you will pick them up. I just had awful luck, and it's good I'm...atheist pride heh...because while there are no atheists in foxholes, I am pretty sure a lot of people would pick up doubt from this kind of thing (namely, WHY ME)

3. quit smoking. I'm serious, I've actually started thinking kind of dicky and been like UGH when I see a cigarette now. mkkmypet's uncle got lucky, lung cancer has a 17% survival rate. quitting smoking is the best thing you can do to prevent cancer!

4. if you do get diagnosed with cancer, for the love of god, CHECK YOUR REMISSIONS AFTER. almost everyone I know who gets cancer that advanced/lethal DID NOT GET CHECKED UP AGAIN. my own father did not because he was constantly shuttling from Puerto Rico to here, and as a result, yeah, he died of pancreatic cancer when who knows if it could have been prevented. this kind of thing happens a lot more than you'd think.

anyways, going in for chemo in about an hour, feeling a little nervous but I'll take an atavan (pretty much a valium) before I go since it calms nerves and also has the effect of killing nausea.

I would never had said it, but since the last picture of you I had seen was with Avril, I thought you had just become really fat. I'm like twice as sympathetic now. Hope everything is going well.

dude come on that kind of swelling is totally unnatural. if I had gained 300 POUNDS maybe!

Wasn't there an option for an organ transplant if it was only just located in your lungs?

it's located OVER my lungs, there's no organ to switch and organ transplants are rare for cancer treatments because of GVH and a host of complications. if I had lung cancer though maybe that would be an option.

the difference here btw is that, the thing is OVER my lungs, not inside it. under the ribcage, which is why all that swelling occurred; it was pushing up on my lungs. there are other differences (you've all seen SMOKER'S LUNG etc) but yeah it's not lung cancer!

oh, here's how big it was when it was first detected:  (from the
report: large mass in the right paratracheal region: at the level of the
carina, measures 9.3 cm AP x 7.7 cm transverse, and the mass measures 10.1
cm craniocaudal).

if you want to translate that, Sredni said it was like a slightly uncurled fist.

Can you explain the process of sterilizing your room? (I remember being worried when I sent you my card because when I was writing in it I SNEEZED but i tried to sneeze away from the card and I wasn't sick or anything but WHAT IF STEEL GETS BACTERIA FROM ME OH GOD)

also.. i pictured your mom sorting through a pile of mail on a kitchen counter, spraying everything with lysol and then reading you the mail from another room so you wouldn't have any contact with the senders


P.S. post a pic of the portocath asap because up till now I've been picturing the IRONMAN glowing chest thing

I'm in the chemo center now, currently recieving a bag of potassium liquid. The pricking of the needle was no big deal, everything went smoothly, and I'm here up till 3 or 4.'

good news; my white blood cells are really high so if the blood work next week shows the same level, we will forgo that nulesta injection and no knee day! doubly good news, we're going to have a cat scan at the end of cycle 2 and take a look at the cocksucker, where hopefully it will have shrunk to a nougat.

as for sterilizing the room; while I was in the hopsital my mom's friends hired some professional cleaning firm to go into her room and just clean up all the bad shit and dirt and everything. nothing hardcore, but yeah be careful sneezing on cards dogg, I don't want to get sick! luckily I got it after I had my white blood cell injection, so it was good timing.

also I just took a pic of IV with portocath that I'll upload at home if I feel up to it.

also also got prescribed a muscle relaxant which will hopefully get rid of this two finger tingling I've been having.

I haven't posted in a long time here on these boards due to real life but I gotta say I'm really sorry to hear that Steel. I really enjoyed the debates and trashing we did to each other whenever we discussed Islam/the Mideast/other shit and I really want to have more of those! Just make sure you get through this...

correction on the schedule; my cisplatin and etoposide are done on the same days, five days a week. right now I finished the potassium, so I'm getting some anti-nausea emetics which will then be switched with cisplatin and etoposide and finished with a bag of liquids. this is so long and boring TIME TO PLAY BALMUNG CYCLE.

I know all of this can be a real tribulation, but the fact that your so emotionally strong and your able to fight both mentally and physically even though your body is under great stress. I can see you surviving this and living on for many decades to come.

My family has had cancer bad on my dad's side mainly from smoking and when I read the part about it moving up the "fetal growth line" in reverse it made more sense why my grandma is having a similar issue. Though she doesn't have cervial or ovarian cancer she does in fact have stomach cancer, lymphoma and COPD. My Great aunt also had carcinoma she had surgery and hasn't had any news of it since.

Those are the worst cases that we have heard in our family (since some of them don't even get regular check-ups) but listening and watching them suffer is horrible, feel lucky your not in the same position as my Grams. She's been given till the end of February to live.

Too bad you just can't sleep or something. I noticed you use the same labtop as me, I gotta say I hope you've got a mouse atachment because that touch pad is a bitch to handle and is extremely annoying.

no mouse and yeah it kind of sucks, but I have no mouse intensive games anyways, and mostly use it for gw and browsing. I could sleep but it's 1:00 pm, so I don't want to fuck up my schedule. my big fear is I just ate so I'm afraid of the emetics I just took failing and that when I get home I'll be bloated to shit.

sorry to hear about your grams, chanicakes. I hope that reiterates the point I've been trying to make though; get regular checkups!

things were REALLY bad this morning. my knee pain flared up in the foot and didn't go away until a whopping six dilaudid and four advil. I'm currently waiting for the doc while getting some fluids pumped in but yeah the pain was worse than Knee Day (but luckily not as long). it still hurts but a dull ache I can live with.

what worries me is we're no longer sure its from the white blood cell injection; it's been way too long for that. I'll update after I hear from the doc, who is showing up in like ten minutes, but god I hope this isn't BONE CANCER as well, jesus.

man this pain was so bad. this knee/joint pain is the only time I lose hope and want to die, it hurts that much.

also I think the fingers thing is from a pinched nerve, the muscle relaxant helped a little but I took it at night and fell asleep so who knows.

Dude if you want I could have someone mutilate my leg with a sledgehammer and then I can feel your pain with you (it is sort of like shaving my head but less extreme)!