Well, my grandmother is an extremely religious person. Strangely enough though, my Father never really picked up on it. My mother's side of the family was not hugely religious either. They both say they believe in God though I don't ever recall a time where they have taken me to church. The only time my dad took me to church was because it was a social event he more or less was obligated to go to and no one was around to take care of me.
I live in a country where pretty much everyone is an extreme fanatic. The schools make you pray every morning, afternoon and have assemblies on Mondays where you have something like a mini-church-service. They don't ever seem to take into consideration other people's religious beliefs and they also seem to instantly assume you are a christian as well. They pretty much are strictly religious.
I tried so damn hard to be like them, but quite frankly I just can't. I cannot worship God in the same way they do. I'm not sure of whether or not he exists, but I feel more inclined to believe he doesn't. At least, the God that Christianity makes out- The all loving, all powerful God who created the universe- yeah, I don't believe that shit. I mean, we all live in the 21
st century, and I'm sure we aren't all oblivious to the suffering, corruption, murder, illness, poverty, starvation and so on. I mean, if this all powerful God truly loved us wouldn't he try to end this? Why would he just let us suffer?
There's also the fact that he doesn't present himself in any way at all. He doesn't interact with us, he doesn't carry out any miracles as shown in the bible, and he certainly doesn't fix the huge issues no matter how much we seem to pray. In the end, it feels like I'm just believing in something blindly and I'm not even sure if it is worth my time.
The bible is also a very irritating book because it puts alot of rules and regulations in your life that quite frankly make it unenjoyable.
I find some of the stories ridiculous and I also don't like some of the morals behind it. The "end days" are almost appalling to me because after all this suffering that God LET us suffer, he lets us suffer some MORE. Then he brings the few who still stuck with him, and brings them into a new world with no suffering and sin. The problem is that no sins means no little sins, which means that life instantly becomes extremely boring since alot of the things considered to be sins in the bible are actually just little recreational things that don't affect anyone. You also live a life completely devoted to God as if nothing else matters at all....almost like a slave. And the fact that you're given an eternal life to do this...? To be honest, I'd rather just die the "blackout forever" way because I don't want to put up with that trash.
If God truly existed and had a valid reason, then maybe I wouldn't mind the new world, but worshipping him 24/7/ sounds like a slavery and not much of a happy existence to me.
There's also
hell. I mean, you pretty much created angels, and somehow one decided to turn against you. That's awesome. Flawless creation abilities there. Next you throw him into a fucking pit, but wait, you still allow him to have access to your newest creations but you don't want him corrupting them. What the
HELL kind of plan is this? Like, are you fucking serious? If you were all powerful, why didn't you just smite him or make him good again, instead of letting him be a problem to you for thousands of years?
So now, you put blame on obviously imperfect beings. You put two inexperienced nudists on a planet and tell them not to eat a fruit and then someone else (who they don't even know is evil SINCE THEY HAVE NO KNOWLEDGE OF EVIL SINCE THEY DIDN'T EAT THE FRUIT!!!) tells them "Hey eat it, God is lying". They eat it, they curse the rest of the species and it is THEN that they learn what evil and sin is. What the fuck? Are you serious? How could an all powerful, all knowledgeable being not foresee this huge logical flaw?
The fact that you don't believe in God also sends you to hell. So sadly, a whole bunch of innocent people in other parts of the world who just happened to be RAISED in a different religion get fucked. What happens to babies? They have no knowledge of God. We're all fucking BORN atheists! Would they go to hell because they just didn't know you? Why did you bother having a fucking baby be born just to kill it? What a great plan and FUTURE as stated in Jeremiah 29:11!
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
His plan and future for them was to never live a life!
So yeah, enough ranting. I don't have a huge history or any life changing events that make me believe what I do. I just grew older and observed more things and payed more attention to the things people were trying to feed me. I used logic and reasoning to believe what I believe in. I guess I'm lucky that my parents were not huge zealots who'd make me go to church all the time because I'd probably be completely brainwashed. I believe that either God doesn't exist or he is an extremely cruel bastard who hates us.
It gets fustration because I live in a society where everyone is a christian and pretty much ostracizes you if you're not. So I have to PAINFULLY pretend. Although, I don't really have anything against christians, I just don't believe what they do. And the people I interact with actually would disrespect my views, yet I have to be mature and respect their's. Either way, I do, I just believe differently.