plot so far: ten weeks ago i started working in academic hospital's kitchen as a nutrition worker because of civil service. basically working on meal belt and diswashing belt plus various of other jobs. other people only wear ear plugs during the dishwashing belt and when washing big kitchen ware, i wear the all the time nowdays. basically four weeks after starting working a tinnitus appeared to my right ear and i freaked out. i never have tinnitus. i went to the company nurse which did some tests and said that there is some ear damage in my right ear so if i'm not careful it can get worse. after that she handled some papers about WATCH YOUR HEARING!!! and sent me away. days or a week later i am at the company's doctor and when i explain her about my situation she says that the nurse hadn't marked anything about this in the papers. oddly enough she keeps beating this through the meeting so uh basically she did nothing apart from just warning to take care of my hearing and stop worrying over it too much.
the tinnitus became permanent and since then i have been worrying every day whether things will go worse. one night the tinnitus got really bad so i couldn't get sleep. week ago this hiss appeared from nowhere when i was trying to sleep at sunday. it have become permanent too. sometimes it changes between being a hiss and being a bleep, propably due to how much i pay attention to it. i hope it won't turn into a bleep permanently.
two or three days ago when i was sleeping i spotted a new odd ring in my right ear and i heard it last night and a hour ago when i put on my ear plugs so i am going to assume that it may become permanent as well at some point.
i can even barely hear the initial tinnitus in my right ear because of this fucking hiss/bleep. i'm not sure at what ear this hiss even rings and i am sort of worried or becoming more convinced that it's both ears.
You really need to see a doctor. These things happen to people. I don't really understand why you're so fatalistic about bad things happening to you, but you're always like this. The problem is that you're afraid to take any part in the direction your life takes. See a doctor.
aaaaa that's a low blow?!? anyways Wednesday i went to the ear doctor of a private company and uh it didn't progress much there (basically a lecture of how ears work and few tests and that's it) and he asked me to deliver the uh, spectrum chart? of my right ear and it's going to be hard to get it, i hope the nurse had saved it. it's expensive but considering new problems are appearing i don't think i have a choice.
the thing is that the chart he is asking for was done ages ago and my situation with my ear has changed a lot since then! I am going to deliver it if i can since it's just the first appointment but i am frustrated. I want to figure out what is causing these problems.