@ DietCoke: honestly? becuase as far as i'm concerined, my body is disgusting becuase i can't stand it's masculine features.
@ Farren: first of all, gender identity is a seprate thing from whom your atracted to, that said i'm bi, why not? more fun, ok that's not entirly true, tbh i'm still not sure who i'm atracted to but so far i seem to swing both ways. I don't strictly wear womens clothing, that said i can't wear mens clothing (well the trousers at least) becuase despite my masculine features i'm rather a feminine physicaly, i can go into that in a moment, but put simply men's trousers tends to just fall off; for the record i don't wear women's clothing to make me feel more fem, i wear them becuase i like them the fact there ladies clothing is an afterthought and yes i think of myself as a women, i just have a birthdefect, having a dick.
@Doktormartini: becuase i tend to present androgynos most of the time most people catch that i'm male, i only tell people i know i can trust i'm trans so i've had no problems so far, but that's also why i haven't told my only remaning parent, i can't tell how'd he react, he thinks trans is a stupid thing but at the same time, i know my dad loves me, we've always had a strong bond.
@Massy2k6: atm i only present fully female on special ocasions, that and when i have the courage to do it, that said i'm always wearing ladies jeans/gothy trousers but i've already mentiond why, i'll speak on that later as already said.
@Afura: that is a very honest question and i don't take offense at all. Yes i do but the reason i need this has nothing to do with whom i find atractive or clothing, i'ts my physical self i can't stand, i need to do this to feel good withmyself, so i can feel normal instead of this horrible presure to conform to somthing that isn't really me. Whilst most people feel bad becuase the think there ugly or becuase of this that and the other they are at least comfortable with there physical selves and the roll they have in society and what's expected of them; for me and people like me, we have the same issues but on top of that we arn't comfortable in our bodies or the roll in society or what's expected of them.
@ Faust: Thanks, your making me blush. Also you say loose somthing and your right, but, for me it's loosing the last evidence that i was a man and instead gain somthing that will make me feel closer to what i should have always been.
Now, before i leave to go and get lunch (mmm salmon en crute) i said i would talk about my physical self. Whilst i am (at least acourding to the doctors) fully male i do have some rather circumspect atributes which i'm rather glad of since it makes it easier to pass. I don't have wide shoulders (ther in line with my hips) and a waist that goes inwards, i don't have a petruding adams apple, my arms go out at a 45 degree angle instead of straight, my arms are rather slender, and my face is really effeminately featured so in that reguard i'm quite lucky. It doesn't take much at all to pass for female, despite that though it's still not easy to work up the courage to dress up and present as female and still can't stand the masculinty i see on myself.
EDIT: i'm also pretty short, i'm only 5'6, well short for a man, also i have really small hands, most women tend to have bigger hands then i do.