well for months i've been praying that god would take away the pain and sadness that you feel through all of this and i'm glad that he did yesterday :> i believe that it was god who took away your despair. it doesn't matter to him whether you believe in him or not, he loves everyone. i know it's hard to think about a loving god in the midst of battling cancer, but hey cancer survivors often find god through their experiences so there must be some reason for it. there's lots of people who find god during tough times. while we may think, "why would a loving god give people cancer to begin with?" we still have to realize that he has the power to take it away. i don't mean to try to "justify" 6-year-olds suffering from cancer or anything, but i do think that god has a reason for everything. of course he is sad to see his children in pain. and actually, god does not give people pain, the pain comes from the world, which is imperfect. people are imperfect and make bad decisions. but god lets his words and his love shine through during those times where people are suffering from the world's impurities. so anyway, maybe his purpose for having you experience all of this stuff with cancer is so you can experience god working in your life when the pain is gone. i dunno.
i think that, for me at least, the most convincing evidence for god's existence is the stories of people recovering from awful situations and feeling themselves that it was god who restored them. this past weekend, i also experienced a "lifting" feeling from god, you know. on thursday at 4 in the morning, my parents were called by the hospital saying that my sister had a drug overdose and that she was in very bad condition. she had taken heroin, cocaine, marijuana, adderall, and xanax. she was having heart arrhythmias and not breathing. luckily, her friend (whom she had been with at the time she passed out from her overdose) was able to give her CPR and get her to the ER quickly. but by the time my parents got to the emergency room to see her, she was already declared medically dead. the doctors and nurses expressed their sympathy and went around muttering about what a shame it was, etc... and then when my sister's friend was standing next to her, petting her hand and talking to her, my sister suddenly opened her eyes wide and "woke up" from being dead. the doctor called it a miracle and he had no idea how it was possible that she was alive. she had been "dead" for 40 minutes. my sister has made a full recovery in the past few days, and may be coming home from the hospital as soon as tomorrow. i had thought my sister was dead, and i was completely depressed. i prayed to god, wondering why this would happen. and then suddenly i felt god lifting me up and i knew everything was alright. it was a weird feeling. that was before i even knew that my sister was alive. so this past week has been an experience for me that i won't forget. and my sister won't either, i'm sure. she felt like it was god who brought her back, even though she hasn't really been a christian or a believer or whatever, not since she was little.
i definitely think that god reaches people through stuff like this. i think you should definitely pray more, and i'll keep praying for you too. :] if you did end up discovering new things about god, hope, prayer, etc. through this, then that would be cool. for now, just be happy that you have new encouragement for your future. stay strong steel
