who are you anyway?
serious
Seriously: assuming you don't browse the forums in braille and you have logged in during the past 2 and a half years, you've probably seen me around.
In the event you haven't I recommend
Specsavers for your visual impairment.
If your e-penis is blocking your monitor and obscuring posts from view then perhaps you could undergo e-penis reduction surgery in order for a cleaner browsing experience. This can be administered via method of ice burn completely free of charge from one of our many specialists in the department.