It's that time of the year. The time for the lists. You know what lists I am talking about: THE END OF THE YEAR BEST/WORST LISTS.

This year saw many Dads in the news, K-Fed and Brad, Karl Malone and Indiana Jones. Many of you here at GW are not Dads and won't be any time soon, but that shouldn't stop you from appreciating just how bad of a year 2008 was for Dads. A simple Google search will turn up all sorts of fascinating stories from this past year about how god-awful American fathers were. Sure my sample has a narrow scope, but if you can't use Google as a litmus test for society then what good is it anyway right? Enough banter, you're not here to listen to me, you're here to find out about 2008's WORST DADS!

5. Homer Simpson

I'm even lazier than the writers of the Simpsons!

That's right I took an easy one.

4. Albert F. Fuller, Sr.

Stock Photo. No idea what this guy actually looks like.
He gave his thirteen year old son pot for his birthday. The kid took it to school and got caught, then ratted out his dad and the po-po came and found his stash. What an idiot, givin' pot to kids. Who does he think he is? Anyway, this fool clearly doesn't know that's a sure-fire way to get your house picked through by a couple dudes who go home at night and jerk it thinking about all the illegal goods they lifted off some chump that day. And that's why he is a terrible dad.

3. Randy Lewis

I give him a 1/5 for effort.
This dude and some woman he isn't married to went and got loaded up on beer and pills and then made his 10 year old son drive him home. Kid flipped the van and they all went to the hospital. Don't drink and let your kid drive you home, stupid! And you should have seen that pirate hooker that was in the car when it crashed. Even though he is a pretty terrible dad, you should still buy him a beer.

2. Raleigh Thomas Campbell

Stock Photo. Probably not that inaccurate.
Sir Raleigh Thomas Campbell took his 9 year old son to a bar. He got in a fight with some woman at the bar and they left. He got picked up by the cops and blew some ridiculous amount over the limit. What a dolt! He should have known better than to get in a fight with a woman at a bar, that never leads to good things. For setting a bad example and also for reckless child endangerment he is one of the worst dads of the year.

1. Karl Malone

He's thinkin' up, but I give him a big thumbs down.
Dude has fathered unholy amounts of children with many many women. First: damn son. Second: you're jealous. Third: One of his kids is an up and coming NFL Lineman and Malone refuses to recognize the guy as his son. He has accepted several of his other children into his family but has left his son Demetrius Bell out in the cold. What a douche move. The best part of the whole story is, Bell was born when Malone was 18 and Bell's mother was 13. For these reasons, Karl Malone gets the top spot for being the worst dad of the year. The shame. It should burn like the fires of a thousand hells. What a chump!

In Conclusion, Dads are bad a lot sometimes. But you gotta love 'em. 'Cuz without your Dad you wouldn't be here. And that's a fact buddy. Now that I've had my say, who do you think were the worst Dads of 2008?

What about k0le's dad

WHAT GOOD COME FROM THIS NEGATIVITY?

c) wash cycles dad

Wonton acts of sodomy with the cabin boy

dads don't need THIS kind of publicity

The simpsons promotes the stangling of children. I approve.

I thought Chris Benoit would have been one of the worst...

that was last year

be honest with you in the early eps despite the strangling homer wasn't an awful dad. remember the episode where lisa's substitute left and she was sad so homer acted like a monkey to cheer her up? then he told Bart it was okay he lost the election, then he helped Maggie get to sleep? homer was a good dad once.......f*ck 2008 homer...

hahahha. DESPITE OCCASIONALLY STRANGLING HIS SON HE WAS.. HE WAS ALRIGHT.

well thats like saying tom is a bad cat because he used dynamite to kill a mouse, cartoons can have their own internal physical violence logic. but when it came to actual fathering homer wasn't awful! lisa's substitute is a particularly sweet episode in that aspect and is my fav simpsons ep of all time. compare this to a recent episode where in order to preserve lisa's bees, homer breeds them with africanized killer bees. the original bees die and the killer bees attack a stadium. in earlier eps they weren't afraid to show him being a GOOD DAD despite being a cartoon fuckup. here its more like he does good things by accident. I mean, the first episode homer loses the christmas bonus and the entire episode is him despairing about what to get his family and how not to reveal christmas is...canceled, and he gets a dog instead. that's kind of genuine, compared to I BRED YOUR BEES WITH KILLER BEES THEY'RE ALL DEAD NOW.

why yes I did watch an obscene amount of the simpsons while in chemo how could you tell.

now watch this turn into a simpsons flamewar *munches popcorn*

ahahah i clicked on this KNOWING crumply would say something along the lines of "sigh...even witht he simpsons he picks fights, oy vey"

Its true, I just stalk steel and then moan. Such is the purpose of my life.

...he's not a dad.

I dunno. There was that episode where they were going through a photo album and Bart was like WHERE'S ALL MAGGIE'S PICTURES and he says, "The place where I need them most," and the episode was about how much Homer hated work and in the end you find out they were all stuck up all over his workplace. I thought it was kinda touching!

Yeah, the Lisa's Substitute and the one with Maggie's pictures at work are both in the Second Season I think. I have the season two and three dvd sets, and watched the crap out of em.