I'm a teenager, so the only jobs that'll hire me is fast food. But I'm too good for that.

what is it about you that makes you too good for working fast food?

Why should I have to serve people? They should be serving me.

Actually I'd be surprised if they even check references for the jobs you are looking for. But if they do it's really not going to be something serious and you can put family friends or extended family members with different names. And if that's not an option I think Headphonics plan would work, they just wanna make sure you aren't going to show up late and shit.

As for finding a job, look into what kind of after school programs local schools offer (elementary schools particularly). I have no clue what kind of funding VA(?) gives their schools but if they have any sort of club program or after school daycare those things rely on college students who don't have a lot of experience for hiring and have turn over from semester to semester. They might even have something like a MUSIC CLUB which would play into your skills.

you are a child

I'm not a child. I just don't think I should work at fast food. I'd rather work retail.    

Actually I'd be surprised if they even check references for the jobs you are looking for. But if they do it's really not going to be something serious and you can put family friends or extended family members with different names. And if that's not an option I think Headphonics plan would work, they just wanna make sure you aren't going to show up late and shit.

As for finding a job, look into what kind of after school programs local schools offer (elementary schools particularly). I have no clue what kind of funding VA(?) gives their schools but if they have any sort of club program or after school daycare those things rely on college students who don't have a lot of experience for hiring and have turn over from semester to semester. They might even have something like a MUSIC CLUB which would play into your skills.

i think you're forgetting to distinguish between personal references and professional references.  they serve entirely different purposes!  yeah he could basically write anyone for a personal reference but professional references are to indicate work experience, not MORAL FIBER so you know, even at some shitty walmart/mcdonald's kind of place, you'd need to do that.  from what i can tell, the economy where he lives is terrible, and getting hired anywhere is difficult as fuck.  even for entry-level jobs, i would say he probably needs to display some type of work experience, real or otherwise, for them to even think about hiring him.  i'm sure they've got a pile of applications from people who're looking for a first job or have never been able to hold one and all of those are going to get ignored in favor of some schlub who's been working at a burger king for the last four years.  ryan could be that schlub!

I'm not a child. I just don't think I should work at fast food. I'd rather work retail.    

i've worked retail and fast food and fast food is a lot better.

To be honest maybe teaching guitar is your best bet. While it doesn't sound like it's too busy maybe word of mouth can make that business grow. Also, working in retail is REALLY AWFUL (not like sweatshop awful, just totally not fulfilling and kind of soul draining) and while you might be making less money teaching guitar it will be immensely more interesting for you. Even when you hate it, it'll still be more interesting.

Plus most entry-level jobs pay next to nothing and the hours are pretty bad, so even a slow-as-molasses guitar teaching job will pay almost as much as selling shitty products to people you begin to hate after awhile on principle. So yeah, I'd say try to focus on something you enjoy rather than becoming a corporate slave like the rest of us. Not that there's anything wrong with retail/service but if you can possibly avoid it then avoid it.

Any job fairs taking place in your area?  Check them out, not all of them are so much about higher positions and whatnot but your lack of experience could be a problem.  Or try a "season" position at a store that should be seeing increasing business now and over the next few months.  Home Depot, Rec Warehouse type establishments, anything having to do with outside activities and things of that sort.  Though if you would prefer something more like your Wal Mart gig, you could always try those warehouse retailers like Sam's Club or Cosco or something.

You can try doing some online affiliate marketing stuff as you're looking for a job (sell things for other people for a cut)... or meet more people, one of them is bound to be a hiring manager somewhere or know how you can get your foot into the door. Good luck!