what the fuck that was a gold postin' post

I demand that warn be retracted immediately and doppler be commended for his razor sharp wit

hey is it still wrong if I fuck a girl in the ass before wedlock to satisfy my sexual urges and just pretend its a guy to satisfy my other sexual urges?

I mean, technically I'm not having sex with another man so it would be alright, right? The bible doesn't say anything about not pretending.

well what do you mean compel? that's not really the kind of behavior He wants to endorse

also a sin in your thoughts is still a sin... i am pretty sure

pretty sure god blew up a city called Sodom.

aaAAARGH PLEASE stop making this kind of topics because they urge me to make utterly retarded replies that end up ruining my shit image even more. Seriously. Shitposting is like crack to me, stop shoveling/spoonfeeding it to me

So wait, what exactly went on in Sodom and Gomorra? Did God unleash the first a-bomb there or what?

stop it don't warn dopple. warn everyone who said Is This A Joke Post

also no swain it is illegal to even fantasize about having relations with another man.

ahahahahah. i hope you're jokin!

i know hes not joking at least about the law of the old testament, which he is right has no relevance anymore

i know hes not joking at least about the law of the old testament, which he is right has no relevance anymore

it's still apparently the word of god though, isn't it? 

Does this mean you throw out Genesis as well?  So you don't have to be a creationist?  I was under the impression that most creationists in the US are also christian, and creation is based on a book in the Old Testament. 

Or is it just the rules of the old testament that are thrown out?  If that's the case, how the hell ISN'T that picking and choosing? 

Both the old and new testaments have lots of sexist garbage, like stuff about how women should totally subject themselves to the wills of their husbands.  I understand that the scripture was written a long time ago, when equal rights weren't very high priorities, but this is the shit that god supposedly said.

Jesus himself had nothing against slavery.  Again, a product of the time his story was written.  But we all know that sexism and slavery are wrong.  Most christians today would agree that slavery is absolutely evil, yet the bible really doesn't have anything against it.  In that regard, Americans are more moral than god or Jesus. 

But seriously dude, unicorns never fucking existed.  holy shit.

why are you dudes are so bad at identifying jokey (is jokey the right word? insincere is what i tend to use. non-serious or fake or in character) posts anyway

also genesis isn't law, it's just fact. can you find the unicorn passage of the bible for me though because i would like to see how that played out

ryan. your a dummy

there are others. i just don't like to see people laughing about my belief system

you know what

jesus didn't have anything against slavery because he was probably just as ignorant as the other people he grew up with, then after the crucifixion and then he came back from the resurrection and was like "fuck it, they'll figure it out"

and thats why we still have mcdonalds and walmarts to this very day

It's really fairly hard to tell which posts are jokes and which aren't but if you believe that unicorns existed  I don't, well, let's just say don't drink water too quickly or you might drowned. Try and remember to breathe everyonce and a while too, once you've mastered it through your mouth you might want to try your nose.

The bible is full of contradictions. David knocked out a giant with a rock then cut his head of with his own sword, but the bible says don't kill people and don't hurt people, and Jesus said 'let he who has not sinned cast the first stone,' when David sinned (he disobeyed his father and the bible also says EVERYONE has sinned). Moses killed a dude and then God drowned the entire egyptian army. Also the bible had 'kings' and 'rulers' and said you should obey them, when that's not what democracy is about at all.

As for the anal sex..... hmmmmm that's an interesting point. I'm not too sure though but i'm fairly certain the bible says ANY contact with genitals is sinful, you're only allowed to have sex if you're trying to make a baby.  

Maybe you should crack open a bible, the support is all genuine.

also @ your second post, idk but I doubt it.

Maybe you should crack open a bible, the support is all genuine.

also @ your second post, idk but I doubt it.

I am still eager to see genuine support for some of the things the bible claims.  And by genuine I mean not found just in the bible.  I could say Star Wars was totally genuine, just look at the movies, books, and video games, and there's your proof. 

I would really like to know of ANY outside sources that can help verify the existence of Jesus.  Nothing I've found was made anywhere near the time of his supposed existence, always thirty to sixty years after his supposed death.

also genesis isn't law, it's just fact. can you find the unicorn passage of the bible for me though because i would like to see how that played out

Ever heard of Google?

Also, genesis is not fact.  it's a hypothesis.

Uhhhhh hey there's the BIBLE. Star wars doesn't have a book like God or Science, that's why it's not real. Also the book of Isiah talks about Jesus like 200 years before his 'supposed existence'