last year all my friends came to my college and hung out with for my birthday. We stayed up to about 4 am and then in 4 hours had a final for English. we had to write a paper based on a prompt on a movie we saw. it was the worst paper I ever wrote and I ended it with "and that's the way the cookie crumbles..."

HEY YOU!

YEAH YOU!


FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK YOU *knocks out an old man* now...im a hero.

man i write all my papers the night before they're due. in high school I'd start them at midnight. freshman year I would start around 2am. now this year I'm not starting till 4. and that's the way the cookie crumbles....

yeah man I procrastinate a lot, but I make myself feel bad if i do, and end up getting shti done

Procrastination. Rampant among gamers for some reason.

Through extensive research, I have determined this very reason.

It's because we fucking play video games instead of doing our work.

6 People in my class today got caught plagirising their essays. Some had bought them off the internet. Mr Wilson was absolutely fuming (especially as, on his way into school, he'd just written off his car).

I also know 2 different pairs of friends who, completely independant of each other, had contests to see who could the most Snakes on a Plane references into their essays.

And those are my essay stories.

on the topic of worst tests (even though this is probably hte best answer on a test i've ever heard of...):

a friend of mine was a calc teaching assistant and said one exam had a question along the longs of

sinx / n = ??

and someone put

sin x / n = six

on the topic of worst tests (even though this is probably hte best answer on a test i've ever heard of...):

a friend of mine was a calc teaching assistant and said one exam had a question along the longs of

sinx / n = ??

and someone put

sin x / n = six

seriously doubt it

this is actually a pretty old math joke that I've heard a few times so. i don't think you're making it up but I also don't believe your friend.

When I was in 4th grade, for a book report, I did a report on a Calvin and Hobbes tpb that I found laying around. Back then I thought it was "Carvin and Hobbies". I ended up just bullshitting the whole thing and told the teacher it was a book with words.

seriously doubt it

this is actually a pretty old math joke that I've heard a few times so. i don't think you're making it up but I also don't believe your friend.

it could be a lie, but it happened 3 years ago (yes i have a good memory apparently) and i did vaguely remember seeing a question like that on the exam. either way, i thought it was pretty clever.

seriously doubt it

this is actually a pretty old math joke that I've heard a few times so. i don't think you're making it up but I also don't believe your friend.

that would just mean someone would be more likely to put that as the answer, maybe it was some kid trying to be funny (and the question being on the test was a coincidence, or a joke by the teacher as well)

I ended up just bullshitting the whole thing and told the teacher it was a book with words.

I'd do the same thing

i did my senior project on AI and robotics. I did the whole thing over a weekend and it was awesome because the essay opened with a quote from the simpsons, and ended with a different quote from the simpsons.

I did an essay on nuclear power and I did that also. I got 100% on it, ironically.

As for personal experience with bad essays, I don't really have any. The worst mark I've ever gotten on an essay is 86% or so.

nerd

i did my senior project on AI and robotics. I did the whole thing over a weekend and it was awesome because the essay opened with a quote from the simpsons, and ended with a different quote from the simpsons.

in college we had to write our final english paper on something in our field (mine is programming), and the english teach didnt know anything about computers, so it was incredibly easy to bullshit my way through it. It was like 6 pages, I did it in a few hours, and contained less than 5% facts.

Yeah well I wrote a paper responding to Wendell Barry's "Why I Am Not Going to Buy A Computer" (anyone that hasn't read this should, it's the stupidest thing ever and shows how uneducated he is and this is taking into account the fact that it was written in the early 90s and he still thought computers were word processors), and I took Barry's list of reasons why computers aren't really technology and countered every single one of them.  One of them was "it should be repairable by a person of ordinary intelligence, provided that he or she has the necessary tools."  I wrote about how all you needed in most cases to repair a computer was a screwdriver and the necessary replacement parts if something needs to be replaced (and if it's software base you don't need tools), and that someone of ordinary intelligence could easily learn how to do it by reading a book about it, and my teacher counted off by saying "this is not true" to the screwdriver part.  He knew at the time that I was a CS major, and yet just wrote it off as being not true, despite having said he knows nothing about computers.  He is basically doing the same thing Wendell Barry was.  Unfortunately it was the end of the year and I didn't have time to go argue with him about it, but it was really depressing.

But, earlier that year I wrote another paper on the article (we'd do a few different articles and write a short essay about each, and then at the end of the section we'd write a bigger article about one of them, so I wrote about this twice) where I wrote it as if I was a defense attorney defending my computer against Wendell Barry's false accusations.  Worst paper ever but it was hilarious to write.

HEY YOU!

YEAH YOU!


FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK YOU *knocks out an old man* now...im a hero.

That would be pretty awesome... revolutionary level

i never wrote a bad essay.....

i must be talented or something