Topic: Game Damage (Read 7169 times)

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yes because reading a review isn't useful in the slightest, i guess because i want an opinion on a $50 purchase i don't know anything about because surprise i haven't played it yet i'm half retarded

like i said i'm not a yahtzee fan. i get what you're saying but really this is just another occasion of you beating a point into the ground just to be a dick??
treg i like how you say i am beating a point into the ground with two one-line posts.  that's good.  also do me a fav and don't ham-fistedly stuff words into my mouth thanks!!  the funny thing is i never actually said REVIEWS SUCK -  BUY THE GAME and you are dumb for thinking that.  the point is that you are being like HEH AT LEAST HIS REVIEWS ARE HONEST..... like this is something anyone should actually take note of.  it is funny to me that there is any circumstance where this would be rattled off as if it is a positive trait and not something to be expected. *is able to play a game and state the abundantly obvious flaws about it.  what a redeeming quality.  that goes right up there with DOES NOT PISS HIMSELF AT NIGHT.  what a guy.

also while we're on it, yeah reviews are usually useless, because 99% of games are exactly what they seem like they will be to anyone with half a brain.  if you need yahtzee to tell you whether or not generic vidcon blockbuster is good or not then i feel sorry for you bud
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The sole point of reviews is to give out an opinion, you NEED a negative dick somewhere in that crowd.

For instance his review of Mass Effect. He pointed out the huge flaws in the really buggy combat and so I was weary of that, it was also because of him that I knew that there might be an encyclopedia's worth of text in there and that the main quest is really short (all reviews pointed out it "isn't as long as most games").

did he mention how little any of that mattered? there's text you dont have to read, combat that isn't the best (an rpg...with less than stellar combat mechanics? STOP THE PRESSES!) and the length is supplemented a LOT by sidequests to the extent that if you're a dummy and want to run through the game okay but it's hard not to run into a few sidequests along the way and you'd have to blatantly ignore them to not do them.

the problem with concentrating on negative little nigglings like this is it doesn't address larger issues. how come there's no real symbolism in games? why do we still tolerate the G.O.D. cannon powered by the seven Apostle mechs? why has it taken so many games and only Dead Space has a targeting system beyond "headshot/not headshot"?

this reminds me a bit of the general state of the fourth estate of media; the media obsesses over Bristol Palin or something that doesn't matter to ANYONE (obama's getting a dog) instead of the severe disappointments behind his cabinet choices or John McCain's general disastrous flipflopping. Yahtzee isn't a real critical reviewer; he's just an IGN reviewer who harps on little negatives while saying nothing of import. do you think Mass Effect would be perfect with a good combat system, more shit to do, and less text? of course not. Yahtzee doesn't say anything other than what we expect; a game has little flaws and of course massive ones but we're not gonna address that. THERE'S LESBIANS IN THIS GAME!
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actually matter.
can i suggest that text so small you have to c/p or zoom in to to read be a warnable offense? Thanks.
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you can't read that?

really?

dogg...vision check!

edit: on further inspection, it appears to be me alone who sees this as near normal size! must be a browser thing.

double edit: yeah in chrome its tiny, in opera it's like a font size down.
Last Edit: December 24, 2008, 03:56:41 am by Pidgeotto221
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yeah it's 4 point and i'm already zoomed in like three clicks because i'm sitting so far away.
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So wait a second here....some of you actually take Yahtzee's reviews seriously?  I only watch one every now and again when I'm in the mood to hear him analyze the pros and cons of fumbling through a 3-D Sonic game versus nailing one's own head to a wall. 
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the problem with concentrating on negative little nigglings like this is it doesn't address larger issues. how come there's no real symbolism in games? why do we still tolerate the G.O.D. cannon powered by the seven Apostle mechs? why has it taken so many games and only Dead Space has a targeting system beyond "headshot/not headshot"?

Lies.

There is Fallout 3 as well.

But yea that is pretty much it. Be careful! Most FPS gamers just want to mindlessly blast things, not take time deciding which body part is best to hit!

That is why we don't have aim at everything systems in every game. That is why.
don't mind me, just postin' after a few brewskies
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really honestly this made me laugh:

Quote from: prince of persia retrospective
It just goes to show never stick your dick in a pudding. It may still be perfectly good pudding and you can spend all night explaining that to everyone but they still won't eat it because YOU PUT YOUR DICK IN IT
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Lies.

There is Fallout 3 as well.

this isn't true I spent more time using the vats system to blow heads off then I've ever spent blowing up or aiming at heads in any other game
DEUCE: MEETING THE URINE UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL AND REALIZING IT'S JUST LIKE ME AND MY PREJUDICES  THIS WHOLE TIME WERE COMPLETELY FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF PTTTTHTHTHH GOD IT'S EVERYWHERE<br />DEUCE: FUCK THIS TASTES LIKE PISS<br />PANTS: WHERE IT SHOULD TASTE LIKE COTTON CANDY OR PICKLES<br />DEUCE: OR AT LEAST LIKE URINE NOT PISS
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Oh please, the average FPS gamer wants to know what the funnest parts are to hit. Especially those dicks who want to blast enemy's arms and legs off and watch em' squirm i.e. me.

I personally prefer this all negative character of his that he created, since I am always skeptical that every paid reviewer glorifies everything on the one end of the spectrum so i'd like someone to glorify the other end.
Last Edit: December 24, 2008, 06:43:00 pm by Boulvae
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why has it taken so many games and only Dead Space has a targeting system beyond "headshot/not headshot"?
just wanna point out i fired up the dead space demo to check it out and found no redeeming qualities or anything that made me want to play it for longer than 5 minutes. it starts you out in an area where you have to shoot things in the leg. that isnt a great targeting system, its a gimmick

and medal of honor on the playstation did it a long long time ago, and thats just the first one i can think of

edit: moh's targeting system also affected enemies. shot in the leg = they limp. you can shoot helmets off. you can shoot them in the nuts. it also had enemies that jump on grenades you throw to save the rest of their squad. that game owned
Last Edit: December 24, 2008, 03:38:13 pm by dom
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this isn't true I spent more time using the vats system to blow heads off then I've ever spent blowing up or aiming at heads in any other game

Very true.  I usually end up aiming for the torso or other extremities only when I'm tired of seeing my foe's face pop like a ripe cherry filled with tomato paste and eyeballs.

Which is never.
For every moment of triumph, for every instance of beauty, many souls must be trampled.
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I can see you brains boy, they flyin' ever'where.
DEUCE: MEETING THE URINE UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL AND REALIZING IT'S JUST LIKE ME AND MY PREJUDICES  THIS WHOLE TIME WERE COMPLETELY FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF PTTTTHTHTHH GOD IT'S EVERYWHERE<br />DEUCE: FUCK THIS TASTES LIKE PISS<br />PANTS: WHERE IT SHOULD TASTE LIKE COTTON CANDY OR PICKLES<br />DEUCE: OR AT LEAST LIKE URINE NOT PISS
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So is he kind of like the Irate Gamer?
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I thought about this earlier today, and I decided I dislike this Yahtzee guy for the same reason that Mo was my least favorite stooge.
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So is he kind of like the Irate Gamer?
no. also irate gamer is the worst. even if you like those guys irate gamer steals all his material from.
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*is able to play a game and state the abundantly obvious flaws about it.  what a redeeming quality.  that goes right up there with DOES NOT PISS HIMSELF AT NIGHT.  what a guy.

also while we're on it, yeah reviews are usually useless, because 99% of games are exactly what they seem like they will be to anyone with half a brain.  if you need yahtzee to tell you whether or not generic vidcon blockbuster is good or not then i feel sorry for you bud

that's not the point?? i don't know the content of the game before it and there are very few sources that don't spew shit like HEY CASTLE QUEST VII WHAT A GREAT RPG!! so if someone is willing to dissect the game and say it sucks i'm KIND OF willing to listen even if he's a gasbag. example: games like oblivion get near universal GAME OF THE YEAR coverage and look good from screenshots kind of but they suck a lot. far cry 2: wish i'd heard a yahtzee review (or rather wish i'd heard ANYONE CRITIQUING IT) before i bought it because the first one rocked, you can find like 2 published reviews that aren't jacking it off all over themselves.

i understand you HATE GAMES or whatever but there's still some out there that are good when you don't expect it / games that look good!! so reviews are still useful, i don't get your point. i could say the exact same thing about movies since most of them suck these days too? that's not the point, i know most games suck balls, i know they have virtually universal flaws throughout the entire medium (HP??), but that doesn't mean i shouldn't try to find ones that don't suck. there are games that look interesting to me that i want to play but i would prefer to read/hear something about them that isn't sponsored by the game developers.

pidgeotto nailed it on the head though i really don't like reading any reviews, yahtzee is hardly better when all he does is yap annoyingly about minor flaws. stuff like HEY OBLIVIONS COMBAT IS UNBALANCED isn't really the best critique when the real problem with the game is WHY AM I PLAYING THIS SHITTY UNINSPIRED RPG THERE IS NOTHING NEW OR INNOVATIVE HERE AT ALL. then again most video games suck really badly, sometimes i think i'm just outgrowing them because i can't stand 90% of the games i used to like a lot. the only games i like anymore are a couple of new releases and old scumm games.
Last Edit: December 25, 2008, 06:32:59 am by stern_gupples

That’s right, you have the young gaming with the old(er), white people gaming with black people, men and women, Asian countries gaming with the EU, North Americans gaming with South Americans. Much like world sporting events like the Wolrd Cup, or the Olympics will bring together different nations in friendly competition, (note the recent Asian Cup; Iraq vs. Saudi Arabia, no violence there) we come together. The differences being, we are not divided by our nationalities and we do it 24-7, and on a personal level.

We are a community without borders and without colours, the spirit and diversity of the gaming community is one that should be looked up to, a spirit and diversity other groups should strive toward.
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he doesn't dissect the games, though.  he does not EXAMINE PROBLEMS IN GAMING; he just focuses on FLAWS and usually they are not game-breaking or the type that would even prevent you from buying the game.  they're just present.  wow thanks yahtzee for explaining to me how games have flaws that generally will not impact whether or not i actually play it.  this is a v useful function i agree.  they're completely worthless reviews dawg.

oblivion is a perfect example, or hell even fallout 3.  all reviews are useless because anyone who is not AN APE knows what these games are going to be like.  i do not even play games and i know what these games are going to be like.  whether you think they are good or bad is besides the point (i kind of have fun with them but not for the reasons other people seem to) because the they are very predictable and if anyone reads GAME INFORMER'S REVIEW OF OBLIVION instead of just looking at the game itself they are probably kind of dumb.

Quote
i understand you HATE GAMES or whatever but there's still some out there that are good when you don't expect it / games that look good!! so reviews are still useful, i don't get your point. i could say the exact same thing about movies since most of them suck these days too? that's not the point, i know most games suck balls, i know they have virtually universal flaws throughout the entire medium (HP??), but that doesn't mean i shouldn't try to find ones that don't suck. there are games that look interesting to me that i want to play but i would prefer to read/hear something about them that isn't sponsored by the game developers.
you're right that's not the point.  the point is that even if you want to find ones that don't suck, reviewing isn't going to help you either way because guess what: yahtzee is useless and full of shit too.  but he is marginally less so than everyone else around him i guess this means he is providing a service??  honestly i think you are too wrapped up in DUMB VIDGAMES to really look at any of this with a level head.  it is kind of a waste of time on my part i think because you are at least somewhat ensconced in GAMERDOM and i will never understand that perspective, but i cannot remember a time i have not been able to look at a game and predict its approximate level of quality without gay reviews.  i understand wanting to find games that are good because i do this too sometimes but MIRACULOUSLY i do not need to read through dozens of reviews written by faggot windbags exampling the superficial qualities of a game to do this.
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now i feel like a flipflopper but okay you win. the first post i wrote was dumb and the second one was more a defense of my dumb first post than a real argument!

also you kind of misinterpreted my argument, i wasn't saying oblivion LOOKED GREAT etc.; it was a successor to a game i really liked when i first played it (morrowind) as was far cry 2. sometimes appearances are deceiving and also sometimes a game which you think MIGHT BE KINDA DIFFERENT THIS TIME because it had a good predecessor, or it was made by the guys who made fallout or something ends up sucking, and looking at the box won't tell you that.

seriously though when i want reviews i usually just go to metacritic and read the summaries.

That’s right, you have the young gaming with the old(er), white people gaming with black people, men and women, Asian countries gaming with the EU, North Americans gaming with South Americans. Much like world sporting events like the Wolrd Cup, or the Olympics will bring together different nations in friendly competition, (note the recent Asian Cup; Iraq vs. Saudi Arabia, no violence there) we come together. The differences being, we are not divided by our nationalities and we do it 24-7, and on a personal level.

We are a community without borders and without colours, the spirit and diversity of the gaming community is one that should be looked up to, a spirit and diversity other groups should strive toward.
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did he mention how little any of that mattered? there's text you dont have to read, combat that isn't the best (an rpg...with less than stellar combat mechanics? STOP THE PRESSES!) and the length is supplemented a LOT by sidequests to the extent that if you're a dummy and want to run through the game okay but it's hard not to run into a few sidequests along the way and you'd have to blatantly ignore them to not do them.

the problem with concentrating on negative little nigglings like this is it doesn't address larger issues. how come there's no real symbolism in games? why do we still tolerate the G.O.D. cannon powered by the seven Apostle mechs? why has it taken so many games and only Dead Space has a targeting system beyond "headshot/not headshot"?

this reminds me a bit of the general state of the fourth estate of media; the media obsesses over Bristol Palin or something that doesn't matter to ANYONE (obama's getting a dog) instead of the severe disappointments behind his cabinet choices or John McCain's general disastrous flipflopping. Yahtzee isn't a real critical reviewer; he's just an IGN reviewer who harps on little negatives while saying nothing of import. do you think Mass Effect would be perfect with a good combat system, more shit to do, and less text? of course not. Yahtzee doesn't say anything other than what we expect; a game has little flaws and of course massive ones but we're not gonna address that. THERE'S LESBIANS IN THIS GAME!
Like Pickleteats was implying I think Yahtzee's reviews are just meant to be entertainment. They're not really reviews.

As for the news media I think they are just entertainment too. It seems like my mom watches CNN & stuff 24/7 when I go to visit and it's really annoying garbage but I guess it gets people to watch. And I have heard about the cabinet choices, I think you just can't really watch CNN and cable news networks for that stuff.

As for the actual thread topic, I managed to watch the whole program. It actually seems like there's potential, but like mentioned they probably need some acting lessons / coaching.
Last Edit: December 25, 2008, 11:29:56 am by charles