Hey thanks everybody for the ideas. Unfortunately as I said I cannot sell weed, and actually I did try the whoring yourself to fat chicks, but turns out 99% of people won't pay for sex, I'm guessing because it's embarrassing.
I have been selling stuff on craigslist, mostly musical equipment, I've made aruond 600$. The loan I'm trying to pay off is from 2005-2006 and you can imagine it's come a long way to just 800$. The deal is my parents were paying for my school, and then had a financial bombshell hit them. They filed bankruptcy and my cosigning on the loan defaulted them to me. Problem was, we were all unaware of this until about 6 months ago when they finally tracked me down. I've been paying like mad ever since.
I think the most helpful suggestion is the clinical trials and sperm donation. I've just send out emails asking for information on both from UNMC and supposedly the only fertilization clinic in my city.
Also, I had gotten a tattoo about a year ago, so I was under the impression I couldn't give blood or plasma. If I can I will be pissed because there were blood drives all over this last weekend.
Finally, I just realized that tax returns are coming! So I might actually get this done! Thanks for all the help!