Fuck. I really don't know what else to say about this. Just Fuck.

I really hope you get through this. I expect to see you telling me how much of an idiot I am for quite a while, so beat this thing and stay with us.

dude

I read this topic today, and after page 7 I had no idea what to say, I went out and hoped if I came back I'd have something to say, but all I have is after I read about it I started to feel sick. I haven't agreed with a lot of what you have said, but I still had loads of respect for how strong willed you are, so you are going to make it through this you stubborn bastard

I'm afraid that's not the kind I have. the one I have is POOR PROGNOSIS 50% or something. basically Lance Armstrong testicle cancer, not plastic gonad testicle cancer.

You will win the race and get the Sheryl Crow.

Seriously...I came to check on this topic having some how convinced myself that it would be, "Ho ho! Good news guys! It's benign. I'll have some minor surgery and will be back to being GW's favourite jackass in no time." Instead, I see the topic title is changed to "I have cancer."

Steel Paladines, you will prevail. Otherwise...this shit just isn't fair man...

I know we haven't really talked much in a long time but back in the day I considered you one of my #1 Internet Friends. I'm pretty sad to see this happening to you, and I really hope that you beat this shit.

If there is a BIG SKY FAGGOT, I hope he hears me saying, "Don't let Steel die..."

Fuck...sorry, I'll try to be less depressing. This is probably the last thing you need right now.

I've been laying bed for the the last two weeks. Functional, but unwilling to do anything. Madly depressed; only two things on my mind. Then I heard about this, and it gave me one more things to hate life over. But... I rolled out of bed three times today, and all three times were to see if there was good news since I talked to you last thursday.

I don't really have a lot of words... and I'm awfully tired. Despite everything else that's going on, I'm going to be around for you when I can, because for a long time you were my best e-friend, and I always kind of looked up to you. We used to chat for hours over ridiculous stuff. We even contended over whose life was more dramatic - and at this very moment it's really hard to say - but you know I love you, man. You're going to beat this because I'm not willing to lose you too, doofus.


Also, it's really terrible that dok posted those after what I said on Thursday.

Magi told me about this. Here's a post about your thing.

My mom died of a breast cancer relapse 5 years ago. She didn't smoke. She was a hiker and had watched her health all her life.

She toughed out a year of chemo that made her miserable and sick and spent it trying not to let us know how miserable and sick she was. Her skin slowly got paler and her hair fell out and her bones ached.

The cancer went into recession. Her hair grew back a little and she went back to work and she started hiking again. She didn't get checked up as often as she could have because she was worried about our financial burden. The cancer came back, and it spread before they found it. She told me just before spring break my junior year, and she spent the next week in a hospital bed in our living room and then she died. She'd been holding it back for weeks for our sake and when she finally let go she was gone in an instant.

Life is random. We all know that on some intellectual level but emotionally it's not easy to accept. Our lives are our stories and we want to see them progress as they should based off of our actions. Unfortunately the world doesn't care about our narrative logic.

What you realize eventually is that you've always been making what you can out of what life gives you. It used to give you lemons, this time it gave you a gigantic pile of shit. But you're still fucking you, so you take the pile of shit and you make shit-aid out of it. You live on your own terms.

Good luck Steel.

PS
Yo my cousin heard that if u eat 400 grams of shark fin a day and do rhythmic deep breathing at dawn ur cancer will be broken up by the karmic waves. Hope This Helps

you'll be better and rapping about the experience in no time, just like ghostface with his diabetes. or maybe (more appropriately) like soulja boy with his...

rap cancer.

Fuckin', as if you'll get beaten by this. You may feel down at times (bit of an understatement), but fuck man, you're STEEL PALADINES and I'll be damned if you don't beat the shit out of this cancer entirely.

I wanted to say something worthwhile but I can't. I'm at a loss for words. Fuck everything.

I didn't think INTERNET could ever affect me like this but I relapsed and bought a pack of cigarettes today because this shit is too depressing.

man i've been smoking like a chimney while i've been at work but this whole sequence of events has just made me fucking think about it.

good luck with everything, steel. you're a strong person in general so keep your chin up and just fucking get it cured ok.

I'm really sorry to hear this.

Magi told me about this. Here's a post about your thing.

My mom died of a breast cancer relapse 5 years ago. She didn't smoke. She was a hiker and had watched her health all her life.

She toughed out a year of chemo that made her miserable and sick and spent it trying not to let us know how miserable and sick she was. Her skin slowly got paler and her hair fell out and her bones ached.

The cancer went into recession. Her hair grew back a little and she went back to work and she started hiking again. She didn't get checked up as often as she could have because she was worried about our financial burden. The cancer came back, and it spread before they found it. She told me just before spring break my junior year, and she spent the next week in a hospital bed in our living room and then she died. She'd been holding it back for weeks for our sake and when she finally let go she was gone in an instant.

Life is random. We all know that on some intellectual level but emotionally it's not easy to accept. Our lives are our stories and we want to see them progress as they should based off of our actions. Unfortunately the world doesn't care about our narrative logic.

What you realize eventually is that you've always been making what you can out of what life gives you. It used to give you lemons, this time it gave you a gigantic pile of shit. But you're still fucking you, so you take the pile of shit and you make shit-aid out of it. You live on your own terms.

Good luck Steel.

PaulC this is a very sad story!!! that's all I can really say about that, but yeah my dad died of pancreatic cancer when I was like 12 so I know sort of what this shit is like. he was told zero curability though.

I'm going to email the doctor today about what the possibilities of maintaining or whatever if I can't get it cured (hanging on a few more years). I mean Magic Johnson, that dude been alive and how long he got AIDS? I'll also ask him how testicular cancer appears in the chest and yet I had no symptoms of testicular cancer (it will probably be something like THIS JUST HAPPENS SORRY PAL). if anyone else has any questions, feel free to ask because I probably have them too and forgot!

Please be strong. I literally don't know what to say.

Mmm this is crazy... You are in my thoughts man...

I know a lot of you are probably gonna go lol doktormartini to this, but I'm speaking from semi-personal experience here rather than from a pseudoscientific point of view. A couple of years ago, my great uncle was diagnosed with colorectal cancer. Doctors basically said that there was too small a chance of treating it to be viable or benificial, considering the side-effects of radiation therapy and chemotherapy (and his age - he was in his 70s). Instead, he opted to be treated through Vitamin C megadosage. The symptoms of his cancer were phenomenally reduced (before the treatment he had unpredictable, constant bowel movements - during and after the treatment he could sit in front of the television for ages and go for long walks without so much as a pain) and there was a visible impact on his wellbeing. I'm not saying this is what you should do, Steel, but maybe it's something you should consider? It worked for my great uncle, maybe it could work for you alongside other treatment?

Regardless, I can't think how terrible this must be for you. Good luck man, and kick cancer's ass. Hard.

that sounds more like symptom relief (as does all the aloe vera stuff) and less SPIRLUNA WILL HELP YOU NOT DIE though so it's not too dokish.

I'll ask him about the aloe vera as well I guess though, so that reminded me.