There was this little plot of unused land behind my backyard, and my sister, a neighbour and myself would go back there on magical adventures. With my vivid imagination, I swear that place was a real african savana.
Believed in Santa Claus until I found out who buys the gifts, and that's about all I remember of my childhood. Most of it is locked in a vault in this damn grey matter.

I used to think muscular men weren't normally hairy because it just fell off from the muscles, and circumcision meant cutting the head of the penis off.

I thougth circumscision was cutting it off. The whole shebang.
Yes, I thought jews had no dick. like they had balls and a stump.

I thougth circumscision was cutting it off. The whole shebang.
Yes, I thought jews had no dick. like they had balls and a stump.

My belief stemmed from in elementary school when me and a friend were peeing on a wall during recess and I noticed his penis looked different than mine. His was uncircumcised, but he just told me "thats cause circumcised penises looked different", so I thought for the longest time that my penis was uncircumcised (which it wasn't).

What let me to believe that they actually cut the tip of the penis off was what I previously mentioned, plus a scene from "men in tights" where Mel Brooks says "nip the tip" and he puts a carrot in a mini guillotine and does so.

wait so your friend was missing the head of his penis?



uh, I never really believed any of this weird shit. I have a twin sister so I was never confused about females, and I dunno about the rest? I always knew about babies etc from the time I was able to comprehend it, my parents never lied about it. the weirdest thing I ever believed was that there were aliens or gremlins or something living inside moon craters. this was from a part of this old film I saw on TV when I was a kid, and since it was black and white and so was the real moon footage, I thought the moon men were real too.

also easter bunny, santa, normal stuff

The next time you guys are at an eye doctor you should mention it.  I know when I have to fill out paperwork before my eye doctor appointments they ask you about that, so even if it probably isn't a problem (I think it depends on how often you see them and how severe it is) it would be good to have that checked out.  I think it's pretty normal to have that every now and then, so you probably don't need to IMMEDIATELY GO MAKE AN APPOINTMENT or anything but the next time you're there you might bring it up.

(approx. age in parentheses - it's a good idea!)


God (8)
Santa (10)
Easter Bunny/Tooth Fairy/etc... (8-ish)
That life had any meaning (23)

my dad used to go out and night and move the gnomes he kept in the garden around so i thought they came alive at night.

also my dad used to take me to a supermarket and whenever i asked for something off the shelf he said that someone had licked it so i wouldn't want it.

my dad also used to pretend that there was a race of giant biscuits which lived in the wild and whenever we went on a long drive he would make a big show about trying to avoid running over the body of a dead biscuit on the road.

these are a few of the excellent things my dad used to make us believe.

Man that is awesome! Anymore stuff?

I used to believe Sherlock Holmes was real, and some cars had no drivers and were moved along the road by giant magnets under ground. I still don't rememby why...

Also when I become a dad my kids will be believing in the craziest shit ever.

You know how there is Washington DC and Washington? I always thought the captial was in Washington..and I always asked myself WHY.

I thought that the devil lived underground so I would flip off the ground sometimes.

Hahaha, I did this.  I used to justify the obscene hand gesture by using that as an excuse, too. 

You know how there is Washington DC and Washington? I always thought the captial was in Washington..and I always asked myself WHY.

haha yeah I used to think the US flag was the Ohio flag and that Ohio was special because we had the nations flag

this was when I was like 6 or 7 during the 1996 presidential race

the smaller your dick, the better

I don't ever remember believing in Santa Clause.  I remember at daycare when I was four (1986) they were trying to pass off us hiding our heads for a little while while the 'easter bunny' hid things in the yard outside.  I think I vaguely remember some badly dressed idiot in a suit.  I never believed in such stupidity again.  They had me going for a few minutes there.

Let's see.  I think later in 1986 I thought that the stork was really where children came from, because that's all the older cartoons I watched portrayed as the truth behind children.  I don't recall when I stopped believing this, but it wasn't long after.  I think the main reason I believed this little lie was I didn't start seeing my mother until I was about seven years old (1989) because my parents divorced when I was two and a half (I vaguely remember hearing them fight, I was two so I don't really remember what was said, just remember that it gave off unpleasant vibes).

I think part of the reason I was duped into believing older people are nice was my grandmother.  She's been defined by everyone I know as a very generous person.  I found out later it was just her.  I respect my elders to this day because of her influence.